Hey!- different start today as this is a different kind of post. Aside from the usual beauty/food-y posts I wanted to type something more personal and some may even say, meaningful.
I have to start by mentioning the blogger/writer how has kick started this whole blog post; Lucy Cowlin (aka LucyTypes) and her blog post titled ”Why Are We Obsessed With Tomorrow?” from last month. To summarise, (I hope Lucy approves of this if she reads!) it’s about growing up and the expectations one should have achieved- alongside the distant memories of our younger years. Something that I think about a lot. Just the way she wrote about this was so relatable! And such, it has inspired me to type something similar..I hope you enjoy.
The question ‘what do you want to be when you grow up’ is one that a child often hears, answers such as a doctor or a spaceman are a few popular ones! When I was younger I think it ranged from being a hairdresser to a doctor and (when I was a little older) a rally car driver. Thinking about it now, all these became from seeing it being done; I had a few operations as a child and I always loved going to the hairdressers! The rally car driver was from playing the games on the PlayStation!
But I never had a specific this is what I want to do/study moment. Truthfully I still haven’t! Wanting to go to university was never really something I wanted to do or thought of. Even today I’m changing my mind to what I want to do/work. Only these days I feel like the pressure is on and time is of the essence. Back at the school & college days it wasn’t so bad to change and try things. Where as now it’s thinking more about the cost of a course or lessons and then if it will actually get you into the said industry and not just be a waste of money. Plus if your 110%…
As you can probably guess, I haven’t gone to university. Honestly, it does not appeal. College didn’t go all that well so the mere thought of continuing with education was out of the question after college. In my second year it seemed so centered around university- ‘where are you going’ , ‘ what are you studying‘ and don’t even start me on the UCAS topic! Plus, when informing most people that your weren’t going and not interested it was met by a snarky ‘so what will you do then!?‘ comment..one which I grudgingly came accustomed to. And in a way dreaded being asked..seeing everyone else starting to plan out their careers and moving on isn’t the best.
Then here we are only 2 years on (2 years that feels like 10!) and I’m still dreading the question, only now it has changed to ‘so what are you doing now?‘. I have been working in a few retail establishments – it’s not what I want to make a career but it’s ok for now. In these two years, the people at university are also getting on with their subjects and other (non-uni) friends are building up their own career and life. Whilst I feel I’m in a rut where I’m not doing what I want yet and everything’s passing me by.
Like Lucy said in her post ”According to statistics, us ladies should have moved out by 22, (22- wtf?!) be blissfully married by 27 and have a cute little baby by our 30th birthday. Oh, and a career needs to somehow develop during these years if we want to maintain a decent standard of living throughout.” It’s like the un-told list of expectations. To have this perfect lifestyle you are most likely one of those people how somehow get everything good by just being ‘you’. Ideally yes, one would like to be moved out and have the dream career in the next few years..maybe traveled and what no, but I highly doubt it.
I find myself comparing what I’m doing with others; scrolling on facebook and seeing how ”Fred’s” starting his own company and ”Cara’s” engaged and moving in to her new home whilst ”Betty” has just graduated in something. Alongside the photos of the ‘crazy night out’ university photos! Whilst I rarely go ‘out’ and am in a job which I don’t want to progress in. This is sounding quite depressing, sorry!
So basically, I think I needed to type out this from my head. I feel like sometimes I have to step back and think I’m only 20! Things just go so fast nowadays; months feel like weeks and people come and go like buses. Seeing blog post about the ‘perfect weekend’ and ‘life updates’ make me want to hurry the whole getting everything sorted thing done myself!
But for now- I suppose I have a roof over my head, earning money and everything not all that bad.
Sorry for this long ramble post! Apologies if it was a bit dull! If you have stayed to the end and are reading this- thank you so much 🙂
Hope you’ve had a lovely weekend,